The Hookup

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Basketball Wives 2014 Rundown: A Chani Caught In Headlights



Basketball Wives RUNDIZZLE!!!!!
  I ain't done one of these in a miz-inute, but I feel I
have to after last night's episode. Mmkay. British, honey triscuit, if you have to tell your man when you leave town to 'be a good boy' and you don't want have to hear none of his "stories" about how 'she got my phone & put her number in', then, my little English Muffin, you might need to re-evaluate your "relationship". I have left my husband to go on trips on many of an occasion & I ain't NEVER had to tell him "Don't cheat on me while I'm gone!" WHA-?!? I might tell him to FEED the dog, but never had to tell him not to BE the dog! Okaaay! Then she basically said "even though I don't WANT to put up with x, y & z, I will...but I don't WANT to." Type o' mess is that??? Jackie too. Perfect Doug cheat with Aggressive Asian Women???? Why EVER would you think that, with your perfect & trusting marriage??? You role-playing Halle Berry n' all?? Hmmph. (Just threw up in my mouth a lil bit. I'm sure Halle did too.) BTW- Love the friend that Malaysia is. Jackie Christie is as CORNY as she is crazy. With that dang bottle her & her Squidward lookin' hubby posed for. I know that was the week before, but had to mention that MESS. Antyways, you, ma'am, at the not-so-tender age of 67, don't know what 'golden showers' are??? Stupid. Brown Boy? SMH. I think she didn't want to put her name on it cuz she knows folks can't stand her & won't buy it. She knows. Now as for Draya and Chani. Tweren't Chani a tad surprised when Draya & her boo just rolled up on the scene. Her face was priceless! Bet she wanted to pull that thick ol' toboggan down over that quiverin' mole. "We do drop-ins too." Yaaaassss!!!! You could tell that Chani was sooo caught up. She wasn't sayin' nothin' til Orlando told Jackie she wasn't his mama. Now he's being disrespectful after she's the one that called him an ugly m'f-er? (And SHE'S married to Doug Christie. Mmhmm...) Anyhoo- Why was Jackie on ten though??? She was all the way turnt, yes, turnT up. Then Chantel taking out earrings & thangs, but NEVER got froggy...cept with Orlando for a second, when she focused on him getting mouthy with her mom who was tripping all the way out on him FIRST. (Wasn't she just hating her mom last season? Yeah...I digress..)Then she stood behind the couch. Ok. "You bes' be glad this couch is holdin' me back!" LOL! As soon as it was over, she looked like she 'felt some type of way', didn't she? She, for once, looked humbled. Sad almost. Like- from 1 to Rihanna how salty was she? LOL! But I think she really liked Orlando & what he said happened did & she knows she looked stupid. Then Jackie called Sundy. And FOR WHAT???? Really. Her & Sundy are way too old to be in mess like this. Delusional Jackie gon' say "And me & Chani sittin' over here being classy." Oh...Was that class? I musta missed that lesson in Classy 101. The "How to cuss somebody out like a sailor, while being TOO grown & wearing a skully" lesson. RME!! Silly Sundy gonna say "Orlando needs his little butt beat & Doug needs to do it." Are you serious?!? Then again, she IS friends with the most DELUSIONAL lady on this side of the heavens. I do believe YOUNG Orlando would take Doug out at his bad, aged knees & yell "Timberrrr!" while doing it. Quit playin'. Last note, I think that Draya did what she did not only to front Chantel out but to make sure her dude wasn't lying. I don't think she was just going for Chani at all. Yes, I think if you have to do that much footwork, it might not be the REALationship of a lifetime, but if this makes her feel better & more at ease, so be it. I think that Orlando does care for her or he wouldn't have done the footwork with her. Many may feel differently, but either way Draya looked awesome in that halter top jogging suit. ;) I would get one if I wouldn't look like a half pound burger in it. ;) Welp, like Chani's face, I'm gonna get lost! HOLLA!!!